Watered Roots: The Relationships That Fuel You
We spend so much time naming the relationships that drain us, the ones that leach color from our days, like a sky burdened with unspent rain. Group projects where you do all the work. Family ties threaded with more duty than delight. Knowing when to let go of what no longer feeds you is a sacred art.
Work, for me, is holy ground—hard, messy, and alive. Each day, my students, their families, and my staff fill my cup, even as it sometimes spills. I show up for them, with all my edges and all my care. Love here is a verb, just as bell hooks promised. Even on the hardest mornings, it’s love that brings me back. When questioned, or when anyone dares doubt the heart in my work, I feel myself flame up, defensive, fierce. Because showing up and giving 100%, again and again, is proof enough.
But what about the core relationships? Beyond work, because let’s face it– the job will be filled when you leave. The ones who water your roots? What about the people who arrive like sun after weeks of gray, brightening everything, adding that perfect, zesty kick only life’s truest connections can give?
The Unfiltered Support System
Lately, I’ve let my mind linger on the ones who pour back into my cup, my sustaining people, the ones who become the sunrise after a long night.
These people positively impact your life and are your personal board of directors, your hype crew, and your sanity check all rolled into one. They see the vision even when your own view is a little blurry. Nurturing these connections isn’t just nice; it’s a non-negotiable part of your growth. This is about celebrating the bonds that make you better, bolder, and more you.
Family Bonds
It begins, always, with my mother. She worries she doesn’t see my love, mistaking my furrowed focus for distance. But her spirit shapes my every day. I am learning to let that love show more clearly, to let it bloom before time runs thin. My father, too: a quiet backbone, steady and tireless as a river carving stone. I don’t call enough, but I carry what he taught me, the muscle and marrow of work everywhere I go.
Rooted in Georgia
And always, my Georgia roots keep pulling me downward and upward at once. Deep family earth, red clay that knows my name. I work to make them proud, to feel their unseen hands steadying me from hundreds of miles away.
The Intellectual Sparring Partner
Some of the most impactful relationships are with the people who challenge you. They are the ones who push your thinking, question your assumptions, and don’t let you get away with lazy opinions. Conversations with them are like a good workout for your brain. They leave you feeling sharper, more inspired, and a little bit breathless.
This isn’t about arguing for the sake of it. It’s about mutual respect and a shared curiosity for the world. They’re the person you send a podcast to with the message, “We need to discuss this.” They recommend books that change your perspective and celebrate your wins with a genuine excitement that fuels your own ambition. These people don’t just cheer you on from the sidelines; they jump in the ring and help you train. They sharpen your wit and expand your world, reminding you that growth is a team sport.
Friendship Circles
There’s a special kind of magic in having people who let you be a mess. The friends you can call after a truly terrible day, not for advice, but just to unleash a ten-minute rant without judgment. They don’t try to fix it. They don’t say, “Well, you should have…” They just listen, maybe throw in a well-timed “He’s trash,” and then ask if you’ve eaten.
Recognizing the positive relationships in your life is the first step. The next is actively nurturing them. It’s about making time, showing up, and giving back the same energy you receive. It’s about being the kind of friend you want to have.
My circle, my constellation of women, stars that guide me home are each a mirror, a megaphone, a gentle hand. They call out my missteps and dance for my wins. Our road has had potholes and wrong turns, but we always circle back. When my vision blurs, theirs clears; they hold hope until I can carry it again.
These relationships are the safe harbors in the storm of adulting. They’re built on the understanding that vulnerability isn’t weakness; it’s the price of admission for real connection. They don’t need the polished, “I have it all together” version of you. They prefer the raw, unedited footage.
A Legacy That Fuels Me
Tanisha. Some spirits never vanish. Her name tangy with memory, bittersweet and bright. She lived unfiltered, mouth full of truth, heart unafraid. She demanded I be bold, be loud, be wholly myself. As the anniversary of her leaving approaches, her echo pushes me to live louder, love harder, don’t apologize for taking up space. Her legacy burns steady, a candle cupped against the wind.
These bonds: they’re my north star and my thunder, my gentle rains and sudden bursts of sunlight. My board of directors and sanctuary. If there’s one thing I know, it’s this: we flourish where we are watered. Nurturing those who pour into you is lifeblood. Clear your calendar. Make space. Bring offerings of your truest self.
Surround yourself with those who add to your light, not those who shade it.
Pouring Back Into Each Other
So, linger a moment with your own people. Who wakes your joy, who tempers your storms, who brings you peace? Text them. Call them. Thank them. Pour back, as much as you are poured into.
What kind of relationships drench you in light? Share your stories in the comments and let’s celebrate the connections that matter.
-Sauce Sculptress
